One moment at a time

The mom-in-hospice care is the backdrop for my larger life change: a vaguely planned but unstructured shift in my career/livelihood. I'm leaving the fast-action world of consulting - two years ago I was juggling several large clients and all their many interactions, providing structures and supports for major organizational changes. Then the economy began to slide (though most of us didn't know it then) and one by one the clients put projects "on hold", canceled them altogether, or reorganized to eliminate my primary contact person's job.

Life is slower now. Our book is out and we're using it to lead programs for improving workplace communication. I have one consulting client remaining, with enough connections to other departments and groups that I am not lacking for work. But I do not have to put my phone on the bathroom counter when I take my shower any more. Nobody's going to call - the real-time urgency of client care is gone. I still check my email, out of a habit of the overfull-inbox days, but that has gone pretty quiet too. I miss the buzz, and haven't completely adjusted to the new pace or the new direction (whatever that is).

My temporality is now one moment at a time, one event or conversation or activity at a time. No more "multi-tasking", and very little rushing around to be sure dozens of people and promises are handled. Things happen on a slower, more quiet clock. Sort of like mom's. Egad. Now there's a frightening thought.